Who Say Our English is TERUK...?

Some people say that our English is TERUK... But in my opinion our English is simple, short, concise, straight-to-point and effective...!! !

Here are some example of how Britons and Singaporeans differ in English...!! !


WHEN GIVING A CUSTOMER BAD NEWS

Britons: I'm sorry, Sir, but we don't seem to have the sweater you want in your size, but if you give me a moment, I can call the other outlets for you.

Singaporeans: No Stock.


RETURNING A CALL

Britons: Hello, this is John Smith. Did anyone page for me a few moments ago?

Singaporeans: Hello, who page?


ASKING SOMEONE TO MAKE WAY

Britons: Excuse me, I'd like to get by. Would you please make way?

Singaporeans: S-kew me


WHEN SOMEONE OFFERS TO PAY

Britons: Hey, put your wallet away, this drink is on me.

Singaporeans: No-need, lah.


WHEN ASKING FOR PERMISSION

Britons: Excuse me, but do you think it would be possible for me to enter through this door?

Singaporeans: (pointing the door) can ar?


WHEN ENTERTAINING

Britons: Please make yourself right at home.

Singaporeans: Don't be shy, lah!


WHEN DOUBTING SOMEONE

Britons: I don't recall you giving me the money.

Singaporeans: Where got?


WHEN DECLINING AN OFFER

Britons: I'd prefer not to do that, if you don't mind.

Singaporeans: Don't want la...


IN DISAGREEING ON A TOPIC OF DISCUSSION

Britons: Err. Tom, I have to stop you there. I understand where you're coming from, but I really have to disagree with what you said about the issue.

Singaporeans: You mad, ah?


WHEN ASKING SOMEONE TO LOWER THEIR VOICE

Britons: Excuse me, but could you please ! lower your voice, I'm trying to concentrate over here.

Singaporeans: Shut up lah!


WHEN ASKING SOMEONE IF HE/SHE KNOWS YOU

Britons: Excuse me, but I noticed you staring at me for some time.. Do I know you?

Singaporeans: See what, see what?


WHEN ASSESSING A TIGHT SITUATION

Britons: We seem to be in a bit of a predicament at the moment.

Singaporeans: Die-lah!!


WHEN TRYING TO FIND OUT WHAT HAD HAPPENED

Britons: Will someone tell me what has just happened?

Singaporeans: Wat happen Why like that....


WHEN SOME ONE DID SOMETHING WRONG

Britons: This isn't the way to do it here let me show you,

Singaporeans: like that also don't know how to do!!!!


WHEN ONE IS ANGRY

Britons: Would you mind not disturbing me

Singaporeans: What the fuck...!! !


So which English is simple, short, effective, ect ect...?