Don't Dare to dream...!! !

Dream…!! ! What is the meaning of this word? I asked a few of my friends about the meaning of dream.

Shahitha told me… “Imagining or hopes !”

Kala told me… “My visions, goals and expectation. To imagine the perfect life with all that I want”

Eswaran told me… “You want to become somebody or want something in life?

And for me, I just feel that to dream you need a lot of guts. Guts… something which I don’t have anymore. I know that I do not have the hope anymore, and so to imagine, I only can imagine being down and broken. I do not have any goals. I do not have any expectations. And my vision tells me that I am gonna live the most hopeless life. I can be only nobody in life, and I can’t dare to want something in life. I can’t dare to dream…!! !

Everyone has dreams to do something, to become someone, to be with someone. I also had dreams. Dreams that I wanted to be completed. Dreams that were special to me. But now, I am in the place where I hope no one is in. I am in the place where I know that my happiness is very near me but yet I can’t take the happiness. Even if I try taking it also, I will still have to leave the happiness and I might create more sadness.

Why is it that when someone can get the happiness and yet he can’t take it? Why is that where he finds that his future will prosper and yet he can do nothing to prosper his future? Why is it that every dream of the person is so near and yet he can’t reach them? Why I can’t reach them? Has anyone seen a more unlucky person than me? Well I guess I just do not have the courage anymore. I am not brave enough to face the consequences of life.

I am a just a failure…!! !

Life and Death...!! !

Living life is very difficult when you are in a difficult situation. Sometimes you even have to choose whether to live or to die. But even when a person is in this situation, he always has someone to console and encourage him. But what if the person has no one left in his life...? What should he do..? I am in the same situation which I would not want to be in.

Everyone does mistakes. And for every mistakes, there is a punishment. But why is it that people get a punishment more than what they deserve...? I did a mistake and I admit it. I even said that I am sorry to all those whom I have hurt. But the punishment everyone gave me was something too harsh. No one forgave me. My friends avoided me. Even the girl whom I love the most did not want to talk to me. She did not even want to see my face. I had no one by my side. I had no one to encourage me. I had no one to support me. I was just lonely.

My Grandma always told me, that if you do a mistake and ask for forgiveness, you would surely be forgiven cause you have realised your mistakes. She also told me, if GOD can forgive us, why can't humans forgive you. But she was wrong. I was not forgiven and I did not deserve the punishment that was given to me. Is this fair to me...?

I have always wanted to give happiness to everyone around me. But I have only given them sadness. I wanted to do something else but everyone thought that I am doing something else. Is that my fault...? Maybe its my fault. I cannot keep anyone happy. So wat is the point of living...? My life is worthless without the people who are avoiding me. What am I to do...?